SEVENTY TIMES SEVEN

1/20/2019 By Jeannie Horton Life Christian University Student

Title: SEVENTY TIMES SEVEN

Topic: Forgiving Others So You Can Be Forgiven

Introduction:

1.  How many of you have read the book the Bait of Satan by John Bevere? It’s an excellent book on forgiveness, and I suggest everyone take the time to read it. As I read the following excerpt taken from the book, I don’t want you to run away thinking you’re in big trouble with the Lord. But, I want you to think about the message and take what I’m about to say seriously. It reads: I heard an unusual testimony about a minister in the Philippines. Friends of mine who had known him from a previous ministry showed me an article telling about his experiences. The man had resisted the call of God on his life for several years because of his business success. He was making a large amount of money. His disobedience eventually caught up with him, and he was rushed to the hospital because of heart failure. He died on the operating table and found himself outside the gates of heaven. Jesus was standing there and dealt with him about his disobedience. The man pleaded with the Lord that if He would extend his life, he would serve Him. The Lord consented. Before sending him back to his body, the Lord showed him a vision of hell. He saw his wife's mother burning in the flames of hell. He was amazed. She had said the "sinner's prayer," confessed to being a Christian and had attended church. "Why is she in hell?" he asked the Lord. The Lord told him that she had refused to forgive a relative and therefore cannot be forgiven.

2. Everything in the Bible is true and should never be taken lightly. If you stop and think about it, how many of you would want God to forgive you in the same way that you forgive those who wronged you? Be honest. There are so many people in this world, even in the church that are in unforgiveness towards someone. You don’t need to raise your hands, but how many of you can honestly say that you are mad at someone right now? Forgiving someone can be difficult. It forces us to think about and deal with something that is painful or upsetting. It forces us to be gracious towards someone who has been unkind. It also forces us to walk in forgiveness towards someone when we’d rather turn away in avoidance. But, God forgave us of our sins so we could have right standing with Him. So, He has called us to do the same and forgive others.

Proposition: God’s commandment to forgive others as He forgave us isn’t always easy, but the rewards are significant to our Christian walk.

Interrogative sentence: What does it mean to forgive someone and what are the steps?
Transitional sentence: As we dig deeper into this topic of forgiveness, we are going first to discuss what forgiveness is, what it isn’t and then finally your steps to take.

I. WHAT FORGIVENESS IS

            a. Forgiveness is the foundation of the Bible and a pillar of Christian character. It says in Matthew 6: 14-15, “If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.” When God says to forgive others, or He will not forgive you, this needs to be taken pretty seriously. God has forgiven us for our wrongdoing by sending His son who was completely innocent, to die on the cross so we could be in right standing with the Father. This is forgiveness, and we are to forgive like He does. Mathew 18 tells the story of the unforgiving debtor. The story teaches us about how God forgives us: graciously, mercifully, and quickly. It also shows us the effects of being in unforgiveness. The first debtor in the story owed the man 10,000 talents which is millions of dollars. The man could not pay, so the master ordered that his wife and children be sold into slavery to pay back the debt. But the man begged the master for forgiveness. The master forgave him, released him, and the debt that was owed.  The second debtor owed the first debtor just a few thousand dollars. The first debtor would not forgive the man. In his anger, he even had him thrown into prison where he couldn’t even work to pay back what he owed.   When the master found out what the first debtor had done to the man, he became furious, calling the man evil. He says to the man in starting in verse 32, “I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?” The master then threw the man in prison.

God knew that we could not buy back our debt of sin, so He bought it back for us in His mercy and grace. He forgave us while we were still sinners by sending His only Son Jesus to redeem the world of their sins so we can have right standing with Him again. We can never repay Him.

            b. Forgiveness is taking the time to heal. You do not have to forgive quickly. Forgiveness can be difficult, and some offenses can be harder than others. If someone cuts you off in traffic, it might be easier to forgive them than a friend who has hurt you badly. Just because I want to take the necessary steps to forgive doesn’t mean I’m going to be able to do it overnight. Depending on the offense, I’ll need to work with God in faith to help me properly and fully forgive someone who has hurt me. I remember when I was hurt by another, in my steps to forgive; I had someone harshly say to me, “Why don’t you just get over it already?” But, the pain doesn’t usually go away immediately. But if you work with God, over time the effects will lessen, and you will be on the path to healing, wholeness, and true forgiveness.       

c. Forgiveness is recognizing that being in unforgiveness is a sin. God commands us to forgive. Ephesians 4:32 says: “Instead be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” Being in unforgiveness only hurts you, not the other person. My pastor Jared once said, “Being in unforgiveness is like swallowing a whole bunch of rat poison but expecting the rat to die.”  Don’t waste your life being angry. Do what God has instructed you, forgive, and be blessed. Ephesians 4:26 says not to let the sun go down on your anger. I always used to think this verse meant you wouldn’t sleep well because you are so mad, thinking about what happened instead of sleeping. I mean perhaps that's very true, but it also has to do with the fact that you are opening a door for the devil and his attacks through anger and unforgiveness. Because unforgiveness breaks fellowship with God, work with God to be able to repent of it and let it go.

Transition: Forgiveness is a pillar of our Christian character, it is a commandment of God, and being in unforgiveness is a sin. Now we will look at what it isn’t.

II. WHAT FORGIVENESS ISN’T

            a. Forgiveness is not forgetting the offense. Some people think that if you’re going to forgive, then you need to forget. This isn’t fair, and it’s impossible. Only God is able to forget. It says in Isaiah 43:25, “I yes, I alone will blot out your sins for my own sake and will never think of them again.”  Forgiveness is spiritual. Just because we remember the wrong done, doesn’t mean we should allow our thoughts to keep us in bitterness. You need to work with God to forgive another. He is the only one who can bring true healing, repentance, and restoration of the relationship.

b. Forgiveness does not need to reconcile. We are all human, and we are never going to have a perfect relationship with anyone. Just because you have worked with God to forgive someone, doesn’t mean that you will have your relationship reconciled and that’s okay. You need to forgive them, but you don’t need to continue the relationship. You can never force someone to reconcile with you. I was hurt by a family member whom we were once very close. We both were unkind to one another. When we chose to get together and talk about the problem, we did forgive one another. However, our relationship is not the same now, and we only see one another on holidays, and that’s okay. Sometimes God allows for relationships to end perhaps for a season or longer. Matt. 18:15-17 says:

If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. If the person still refuses to listen take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector.  

This verse is saying if someone has wronged you, go to them in private and talk to them one on one about your hurt and try to reconcile. This scripture doesn’t say to go and tell someone else in gossip. I think when our flesh is hurt; we always want to tell someone about it. This may temporarily make us feel better, but in the long road, it only makes us feel worse and causes more damage. Don’t even go to another and ask them to pray for the other person. It says to go to the person who has sinned against you, making it between the two of you. But, if that person refuses to listen, get a couple of believers to go with you as witnesses, and if that doesn’t work, get the church involved. If the person still refuses to listen, let them go. But let’s be real, it’s uncomfortable to go to someone who has hurt you and admit there’s a problem. I’ve been in the position of being hurt by another, and I knew that I needed to go to them and talk it out, but it didn’t feel right. I tried telling myself that what they did was no big deal and I’ll get over it. But, the truth is, the problem will always linger if not confronted, hurt feelings can get worse, and bitterness sets in. By this point, you’ve given the devil a foothold. So, it is essential if you’re going to have a relationship with anyone, learn to be good at communication and forgiveness.

            c. Forgiveness doesn’t release the person of responsibility. There will always be accountability for sin. The person who hurt you is still responsible for the damage caused by their sin. It’s important to forgive them, but this doesn’t mean they’re off the hook. For example, if a person is married with children, has an affair and gets a divorce. This person still will need to take care of the children. Give the situation over to God and leave it with Him. Psalm 34:19 says, “The righteous person faces many troubles, but the lord comes to the rescue each time.”  And Psalm 138:7 says, “Though I am surrounded by troubles, you will protect me from the anger of my enemies. You reach out your hand, and the power of your right hand saves me.” Allow God to fight your battles for you.

            d. Forgiveness is not a onetime event. You may need to forgive someone more than once especially in close relationships like family or co-workers. The bible says in Mathew 18 that we should forgive someone 70 times 7. This may sound like a lot, but God has forgiven us probably more than that, and He will continue to do so. We’re only human, and humans make mistakes. In our sin nature, we say things we don’t mean in anger, and we do things without thinking about the consequences: all only to regret later. It’s important as a believer to be diligent learners and doers of the Word and to grow in Christ. In order to be effective Christians, you can’t just read the Bible as quickly as possible. You need to study it and apply it to your life. Ask God to show you anything that isn’t pleasing to Him and work with Him to change as He is the only one who can change you: You cannot change on your own strength, it will not work.

Transition: Forgiveness doesn’t mean you need to forget the offense, it doesn’t mean you need to reconcile, it doesn’t release the person who did you wrong of responsibility, and it isn’t a onetime event. So what are the steps to forgive? We’ll look at that next.

III. STEPS TO FORGIVE

            a. Pray and ask the Holy Spirit for help. We are anointed for hard things in the Lord, and He will help you through this. Admit that you have a need and that you need help in forgiveness. God likes a humble heart. Pray for those who have hurt you. You can’t stay mad at someone you’re praying for. Others have hurt me, and it took me quite a long time to fully forgive a few individuals, but I did. With one person, I knew that I was supposed to pray for them, but I was furious, hurt and bitter. This person’s attack went on for too long, and repeatedly. I honestly couldn't say anything in prayer. But I heard God say tell me to say the Lord's Prayer over their life. I did that as a first step, and that's all I could do for quite a while. I still remember what this person had done to me, but I choose not to let the offense have any control over me. I gave it to God, and I let it go.

b. Pray and ask the Lord to bless them. It says in Mathew 5:44 NKJV “But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you.” God is instructing us to pray and ask for our enemies to be blessed. Obey God: repent, forgive (even over and over again), and pray for the other person to be blessed. What do you mean pray for them to be blessed? They hurt me very badly; I don’t want them to be blessed! Yes, pray for them to be blessed because what happens when you pray that they'll be blessed (and mean it), you’re opening the door for God to work through them. God will show them what they did wrong in conviction. God is a restorer. He ultimately wants all relationships to be restored. God forgave us through Jesus, and we are to be imitators of Him.

c. Don’t speak negatively about the person who hurt you. You’re not in true forgiveness if you’re still speaking negatively about the person who hurt you. If you’ve prayed over them, asked the Lord to bless them, and believe you’ve forgiven them, you’re only opening up old wounds if you speak negatively about them. And the more you do, the more old wounds resurface, and you’re just causing damage again. Don’t do it. Negative words, hurtful words wound and it takes many more kind and loving words to make things right again. Negative and unkind words hurt us, the person you are speaking about, and they grieve the Holy Spirit. Every time a negative thought surfaces, push it aside and say something positive. I wonder how many marriages could be saved if instead of condemning, finding fault, and criticizing one another, you made deposits of kindness? If your spouse does something kind for you, say
“thank you, I appreciate what you did.” If they look nice, tell them. If you can’t think of one positive thing about the person who has hurt you, then give thanks to God. Thank the Lord for his goodness, grace, and mercy. Thank Him for restored relationships. Thank Him for forgiving you every time you do something wrong.

d. If the person has a need, meet it. Romans 12:21 says that we overcome evil with good. We fight Satan when we do something good for another. Satan would love it if you got mad, stayed mad and went out and hurt someone else. Don’t! Be a blessing to someone else, even the person who hurt you. If it wouldn’t be wise to do good to those who hurt you, perhaps in situations of abuse, go out and do good to someone else. But, don’t just sit at home being angry, overcome evil with good! Luke 6:33 talks about doing good to those who are good to you that even sinners do that. That’s easy. It’s easy to do good to those who are our friends and who are kind to us. Be like Jesus and do good to those who are not kind to you. Verse 35 goes on to say, “Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be great, and you will truly be acting like children of the Most High.” Wow! This verse is saying to love your enemies. Do good to them without expecting anything in return, and in doing so, God will reward you. In the book of Proverbs verse 21-22, it says, “If your enemies are hungry, give them food to eat. If they are thirsty, give them water to drink. You will heap burning coals of shame on their heads, and the Lord will reward you.”

Conclusion

1. Let’s be victorious Christians. Let’s not be like the world, but let’s act like Jesus. Let’s go around looking to be a blessing to everyone, even to the people who use and hurt us. If you follow a few principles of forgiveness and loving others as Christ would, we can be a Light to this lost world. In Jesus’ final moments on the cross, He cried out to God to forgive them for they know not what they do. He demonstrated the greatest act of forgiveness, and we are to follow in His footsteps. Forgiving someone can be very hard, but God has commanded us to do it. Act like children of God and forgive others as He has forgiven you.

2. Say this prayer with me. Dear Lord Jesus, I repent of being in unforgiveness, and I want to make things right with you. I do not want to give the devil a foothold in my life. So I take authority over Satan and take back his power in the name of Jesus. I stand firm in my faith in Jesus. I want to be in obedient to Your word, and I don’t want to break fellowship with You. I truly forgive those that I haven’t forgiven yet. I release them, and I give them over to You. I ask that You would bless them, and give them joy, peace, health, and love. In the name of Jesus, I pray, Amen.